Today.... TODAY, I recommit

Well I was feeling pretty good about writing this blog post today until I logged in and saw that my last post... ahem, in April (oops).... was also about recommitting.... 

But I wont let that stop me, I won't let that get me down. because I have decided that TODAY is the day that I am re-committing myself to my journey! It's not time to give up! So I will NOT be quitting! 

I've gotten off track again... guess that makes me human.

I was doing so well! I was working out 4 hours a week with a trainer and I FELT so good. I felt strong and healthy. I finally hit my 50lbs lost goal in May.... and then life happened... again. School got out, summer was here and so was my unhealthy appetite. I traveled about 4 hours North with my kids and our pop up trailer and went camping for 3 1/2 weeks .... it was amazing. I worked out almost everyday when I first got there. But I also went into "vacation mode" ... you know the mode where, hey, I'm on vaca... I can eat like crap mode! ... well it might be ok when your vaca is only the weekend, but mine was for 3 1/2 weeks! ... Not ok! absolutely not ok. 

So, today I am choosing to recommit. I'm committing to choose the path of health and happiness. And again, I am announcing it to the world.

 I read an article the other day (click here, good read! ------->) Why 5 is a magic number.... Basically it said that goals are better reached when you set smaller achievable DAILY goals that put you in the right direction to reach you end goal. So, my goals for the rest of the day are:

1. no negative self thoughts

2. eat a healthy dinner

3. play a game with my kids before bed

4. kiss my husband goodnight

5. go to bed at a decent time

My end goal is Health and Happiness. It's a pretty broad goal, but to me, those are the most important things in my life and encompass alot... myself,, husband, children, friends and just life in general. I really think that everything else will fall into place and be as it should if I can get to a place within myself that is healthy and happy. 

I am always open to talking.. send me a note if you'd like :) 

THE STRUGGLE IS REAL!

OK... So I'm back....  it's been awhile since I've posted........ It's been awhile since I've posted because I have felt like a failure. I have not lost any weight since October/November ish.... well I've bounced up and down 8-9 pounds since then. I've been blaming it on having to wear a boot on my leg for 6 weeks in October, or my eye surgery, or heck, even the holidays.... yah Jenn... your ankle is in pretty good shape... you can now see 20/15, and the holidays are long gone. Well I'm tired of making excuses for myself. I NEED to take accountability and get back on track!

A wise woman I know posted this picture many times in a group I'm part of.... It's the honest to goodness truth about weight loss:

Well this is my exact weight loss from a graph from MY myfittnesspal app! :

The big drop was from end of May to November... I had lost 47 pounds total...  then those ups and downs are my 8-9 pounds... THE STRUGGLE IS REAL

I decided that it was time for me to get back to posting.. because the STRUGGLE IS REAL. Every single day is a struggle with me and weight. What to eat, how I feel, if I even care at that moment. What to do. What not to do. To even get out of bed some days. 

 Life happens, we all fall down. BUT we need to get back up and keep trying.....

Lately I have not been making the best choices nutritionally.  If there is one thing I have succeeded with in the last 6 months it is definitely self sabotage. I think I have mastered that art. I honestly think that will be something that I struggle with for the rest of my life.  I am WORKING on it every day though....  just last night I went to a birthday party with pizza and chocolate frosted cake... I can still smell the frosting! .....  Well, small victory.... I didn't take 1 bite of pizza OR cake! ... I actually got up and moved to a different table so I didn't have to torture myself with the smell of that frosting.

Fast forward..... OK ... its been a few days since I've started writing this.....  I just re-read what I had written, and once again, I sabotaged myself this weekend! Last night we went to my inlaws for Easter dinner. Before we left, I had my shake so that I wouldn't be hungry. I knew I would eat a little bit of waffle.... it's tradition, can't skip a waffle on Easter....  well 2 waffles later and some bacon, and I was stuffed and felt sick to my stomach. Not to say you can't enjoy these things once in a while, but I'm really thinking I'm still on the part of my journey where I need to avoid all temptations, even those "but its a tradition," "it's a special occasion" .... right now I'm using these as my excuses. I am NOT a I can eat just one kind of person... I'm a eat NONE or eat the whole damn bag kind of person.
 THE STRUGGLE IS REAL!

Oh well.... TODAY we get up and brush that off and get up again and keep pressing forward.  What's life without a few bumps once in a while.... Some might be small, some might seem like a mountain. But I know that I can overcome ANY size of bump that I might run into! 

Well I am definitely excited to get back on the wagon! A good friend of mine talked me into starting personal training 2 weeks ago!! The first week was definitely a surprise to me!!! I was so stinkin sore the first week... I could barely stand up and sit down!!!  But even after just 2 weeks, I can FEEL myself getting stronger! I've also been walking with another friend every morning, bright and early! .... and then sometimes I walk with my hubby at night!

THE STRUGGLE IS REAL

folks... whether yours is with food/weight like mine, or whatever you struggle with... know that you can overcome it.... there will be bumps in the road, maybe even a slight detour... but as long as you get up, dust yourself off and get back on track, YOU can do it!! YOU are an amazing person, and YOU can do amazing things! 

So, as a friend of mine this morning said #watchme or #joinme  

I'm always looking for people to join me on my journey with your own journey. Life is much easier when you have someone to do it with. If any of you ever need someone to talk to, please don't hesitate to contact me! WE can do this together!   <3 you all! ~Jenn

My 16 week journey Including Loneliness

OK.... So there are 2 things I want to talk about today.

My 16 week Journey

and

FEELING LONELY

Lets talk about feeling lonely first. I think it was 2 posts ago, I touched on this subject, but I didn't go into detail. You know where I said I was crying to 2 lovely ladies that were vising me? Well, now I realize after talking to some others, that I NEED to share this.

{deep breath} .... sometimes as I'm typing these things I need to take some deep breaths and just put it out there! 

{another deep breath} ... ok.. here I go......   

So, I have a WONDERFUL husband... and 4 AMAZING kids right?!?! They truly are wonderful. and yet.......   some days, I just feel LONELY. ALONE.

Apparently, I'm not alone in this. ---didn't think I was, just never really thought about others feeling like this---.  heck... if this is true and this guy feels it... 

I always look at everyone else around me and think how wonderful their lives are with all the fun they are having and all the friends they have. I was sitting with my daughter at lunch one day and looked around and saw all these groups of women eating together... and was like, "where's my friends? oh ya... dont have any." "No one likes me" blah blah blah..... the typical negative self talk.

OK....  so, after having this moment where afterwards, I was like "why am I saying these things to these lovely women who are visiting me right now?", but honestly, it felt sooooo good to put those thoughts into words. I have a hard time putting my thoughts into words sometimes... which is why I tend to ramble, and nothing makes sense when I'm done rambling. 

Anyhoo..... after this moment, during the next week, I talked to 2 different ladies who said the same thing. And if the 2 people I happen to talk to feel this way, how many others feel the same way???  One said to me 

"Lately I've been feeling super lonely" 

"Hearing you say you like me, even 

though I'm a full grown adult, is 

just so amazing, you have no idea."

When I read that text I got, I wanted to run over there and give this girl a hug! As much as I don't want other people to feel lonely... it kind of validated my feelings. 

If the girl who texted this to me is reading... THANK YOU for saying that to me. YOU have no idea how much those words helped ME! 

Then it also made me think... wait a minute, this girl, lonely? why? She's an amazing person. The other lady, also an amazing person surprised me when she said she felt lonely sometimes too. 

Then it HIT ME! We all need to leave our comfort zone that we live in.... I need to stop sitting at the empty table waiting for someone to come sit by me! I need to invite people to do things with me! I need to talk to THEM! I've always gotten the impression that no one likes me because I didn't get invited to things, or no one sat by me when I was sitting alone. HELLO?!? 

I know not every person in the world wants to be my friend, but I sure as hell think if I initiate more things, I will see that there ARE people that like me!  I am a very quiet and timid person by nature... so this is a challenge to myself... and YOU.... let's all get out of our comfort zone... because if you're like me.... you're not happy where you are in your comfort zone.... and no one can do anything about that except for you!

OK... so my 16 weeks. I debating on talking about this b/c I really don't want this all to be about Isagenix... but then I thought... I wouldn't even be writing this blog if it weren't for Isagenix. Like I've said before, writing this blog seems crazy to me... Im not THAT person! 

I have become much more confident in myself. I still have work to do, but I like the direction that I'm going in. 

With Isagenix they have the ISAbody challenge... It is a 16 week challenge. You keep track of your weight and measurements and pictures. At the end of the 16 weeks you submit your end pictures and a small essay to talk about your 16 week journey. With this, everyone that completes the challenge and stays an active member of Isagenix, gets a $200 certificate to use towards product. and a t-shirt..... If you do REALLY well, you might be chosen for bigger prizes, up to 25K. .... 

So, I just completed my challenge this week. Even though I think I could have done better, I am very proud of myself! I have lost 35.1 pounds and 42.5 inches. Yay me! 

My next 16 week challenge, I am going to ROCK it! ...

And I almost forgot! 

MY HUSBAND asked to start! How crazy is that? I think he was even more of a skeptic than I was when I started! I'm thinking he must be liking the changes he has seen in me. He lost 4 pounds and 4.5 inches in his first week.. (ugh guys, always so fast) so good job hunny!  I love you so much and am so glad you started doing this with me! You are amazing and I thank you from the bottom of my heart for trusting me to jump into this journey. 

So there ya have it folks... can't believe I shared that much today :) ... moving onward and upwards on my way to being a happier and healthier person.... :) 

Love you all and thank you all for the support that you give me everyday! I could not do this without all of you! 

And as always, if you would like more info on Isagenix, please let me know! I will help you sign up and start receiving product to help you feel your best! There are links provided within this blog...  if you want to sign up, let me help you! :) 

LOSING IT!

OK... so its been 4 weeks since I've updated :) 

In the last 4 weeks I've lost an additional

9.8 inches and 6.8 pounds! 

That brings the week 14 grand total to 

38 inches and 27.8 pounds !! 

The last 4 weeks has been kind of a roller coaster for me. I've been battling +/- 5 pounds... which drives me crazy! 

I saw this on a facebook page and it makes soooo much sense!!!

So.... I just need to remind myself... that the bottom picture is what weight loss really looks like... as much as we all wish it was the top picture! lol :) It is a PROCESS!!! It takes time, adjustments, and life! lol :) 

So... because I look in the mirror at myself everyday... I have a hard time seeing a huge difference in my physical appearance... i know I FEEL better... but its hard to SEE it.  So.... today I took my tape measure and wrapped it around my body in a few places and held it at my day 1 measurements! Holy cow! .... That really hits home that its not just about the pounds. 

Just take a look for yourself! 

In 14 weeks, I may have only lost 27.8 pounds, but when I hold this measure tape up and physically see the difference... it makes it that much more rewarding. .... now I know all the inches weren't off directly in front of me, and gotta spread it out evenly around my body... but still.... LOOK AT THAT! :) 

A little over a week ago, I was talking to a couple of good friends of mine, crying about how I feel about certain things in life... and after getting out all of those lovely emotions, I decided, I HAVE TO BE HAPPY FOR ME!  I know it will be a life long battle with myself caring what others think, or how many friends I have, or what I don't have in life... But I am going to do the best I can to throw all the negative thoughts away, and to focus on just being HAPPY :) ....

So, to help with that....... 

Last week I threw myself way out of my comfort zone! Ha! I... this girl... who has no rhythm, can't dance to save my life.... went to ZUMBA! And I loved it! Such a good work out! I may never get the moves down, but I will go twice a week as much as I can! Just please no one ever tape it and put it on youtube... I will hunt you down!

I'm also playing volleyball once a week now... well started last week and intend to play every week when I can... it was so much fun! 

OK.. so I was saying the other day that I just don't feel like I have the energy that I hear all these other people that are using Isagenix talk about.... then I recalled, UM... ZUMBA.... VOLLEYBALL... WALKING.... RUNNING.... STADIUM STAIRS.... FLIPPING TRACTOR TIRES.... .. um, well of course... I EARNED being tired! so yes... I have plenty of Energy... and I'm actually putting it to good use! lol :) 

I honestly am so very grateful for being introduced to Isagenix.... it's the first thing in 10 years that has got me results and dedication... I still have my days where I fall off the wagon, thats life... but I just have to look at what I've been able to accomplish and then I am right back on that wagon! 

One last picture.... boy do I not really enjoy this part :) lol... but here it is! Day 1 versus Week 14 (98 days) 

And as always, if you would like more info on Isagenix, please let me know! I will help you sign up and start receiving product to help you feel your best! There are links provided within this blog...  if you want to sign up, let me help you! :) 

Week 10!

OK...  so here we go.....  It's been 10 weeks!! ....  

Well 10 weeks since I've started.....  but I may have gotten off track for the last few weeks....

In the end of June I went camping for 2 1/2 weeks. I brought my blender and all of my Isagenix stuff. Darron was with me for the first 2 days, and then he came home to work for 4 days, then came back up for 4th of July and stayed for a week. Camping proved to be a struggle for me with keeping to the plan. My husbands family was all there camping too... so we had lots of fun. Included in that fun was lots of snacking... I am a big fan of snacking. Its been my biggest struggle since starting on this journey. If food is in front of me... especially snacky food...  I have a hard time resisting. 

I also forgot to bring some medicine with me... I haven't shared with alot of people that I take this medication... but if I'm going to be real, might as well put it all out there. 

After Tyler.. my youngest was born June 25, 2013,

(This is him on his first birthday... isn't he so sweet? :) ... 

...... I struggled to feel like myself. I was very emotional, sad, angry... you name it... all the emotions could happen in one day.... So after talking with my Dr, he prescribed me an anti-depressant. And it helps! I've been taking it for almost a year now, and can definitely feel a difference when I miss it. (I have a goal to be off of it soon!!)

So ..... Not doing Isagenix (eating crappy) and forgetting my meds and not having my husband to help with the kids for the first week really threw my body and mind for a loop. And did I mention that after the first 2 days, it rained everyday for the next 2 weeks?!?! .. oh ya, and my van battery wouldn't start, we had issues with the pop up trailer we just bought... I was just a MESS! Stress level was off the roof! 



Once Darron returned... I made it a point to at LEAST do one shake a day... and he brought my meds back up... so I TRIED to not be so bad with my diet ... but I allowed myself to indulge while camping....  and I was a little bit more stable and sane
:) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :)



 here are some camping pictures :

When we got home... I was seriously thinking I had gained some major weight back.... but to my surprise, it was only 2 pounds! 

Even after being happy that it wasn't more than 2 pounds... I had a lot of negative things to say to myself.... I need to learn how to not be so mean to myself. I have this amazing program that I know works... and I let myself get off track....  

And us being the crazy people we are ... left for camping again after being home for 5 days... this time was just a weekend though! :) :) :) .... 

So 10 weeks in and I feel like I'm having a new beginning this week! Monday I started back up on my shakes and this morning I went walking... left at 6:30 am and it was already 90 degrees! Blah! 

I WILL make a vision board this week... I NEED the motivation! 

OH ya!! The 10 week Results.....  I have lost a total of 21 pounds and 28 inches! I guess that is something to be proud of... now back to the grindstone and lets lose some real weight!!! :)

And as always, if you would like more info on Isagenix, please let me know! I will help you sign up and start receiving product to help you feel your best! There are links provided within this blog... but if you want to sign up, let me help you! :)  

Week #5

So... another week has gone by! 

It was a good week overall. I had a couple of set backs.. ate some pizza and ate out at Red Robin! MMMmmm.....    and I missed 3 days of working out in any form! 

So, last week after my 30 days, I'm not going to lie... I started thinking very negatively! Which is so dumb, because the results were GOOD! Guess its human nature... at least for me...  to do that.... My goal was at least 15-20 pounds in the first 30 days... I fell a little short and hit 13.5....  I told my husband that I didn't want to do it anymore! We live in such an instant world... that I have this unrealistic thought in my head that I'm going to be skinny like tomorrow! Well we all know that isn't going to happen! Like I said before... Rome wasn't built in a day... and either was my body, so don't know why I would think it'll be fixed in a day. 

Results for week 5??   I lost 2.9 pounds last week, bringing my total to 16.4 pounds! I'll take it! 

I've decided to do weekly weigh-ins and do my measurements every 15 days... so I will let you know how that goes on my next measurement day, on July 3! 

Someone close to me, who I love so much, told me (a couple weeks ago) that she has been taught to have positive affirmations, and to stop talking down about herself...  so I started thinking about that after my negative thoughts. It is such good advice. I told myself that I am not allowed to think these negative thoughts anymore....  so POSITIVITY here I come! I need to love myself with who I am YESTERDAY, TODAY AND TOMORROW!

So, I've been encouraged to make a vision board... I think when I look at this everyday.... it will help me see what my goals are and help me to be positive! .... maybe I'll carry it around the house with me so it's always in the same room as me! .. I will make it this week and post a picture of it next week....I've had this saying on my bathroom mirror for like a year! .... I love the quote... I need to take that advice that I gave myself over a year ago! FIND JOY EVERYDAY!

But overall Im feeling good! I got to cleanse this week! I took last week off... 3  2-day cleanses in 3 weeks... I wish I could do it every week... but they recommend you let your body take a break! So I cleansed Monday and Tuesday of this week! 

This was my hardest cleanse.... I was hungry this time! The other 3 times I thought it was so easy! Maybe it's because I went to bed hungry on Sunday night! I knew I hadn't eaten enough calories Sunday night... but I ignored that and went to bed! Won't be doing that again! That and this is the first time I left the house for a good chunk of the day while cleansing! I took my kids to the summer movie fun, then went and picked up some more Isadelights (these yummy chocolates you can eat while cleansing), then I went to Costco AND Sam's club! Call me crazy! Picked up a rotisserie chicken for tonight's dinner... and had to smell it the whole way home... 

You know how they tell you not to go shopping while your hungry?? Well you should definitely NOT go shopping on your cleanse... especially day 2 of your cleanse! And let me tell you... they were doing samples at both places! It's like they were taunting me! 

As for working out... I'm going to try to switch it up and work out in the mornings. I've been doing it at night, but then I'm all awake and can't go to sleep... and I NEED more sleep! Sleep is supposed to help with weight loss... so I'm gonna give it a try! That and I like spending time with my husband at night when the kids are in bed. Tyler has gotten really used to falling asleep in the stroller for nightly walks, so I might still walk at night, just not as long... plus it wouldn't hurt to get a walk in at night after a morning work out anyways.. :) I definitely need to step up the intensity too!

So... here's to another week!!!!! 

I have a friend that has joined Isagenix last week... and she lost 11 pounds and 19 3/4 inches in her first week! I'm so proud of her! She did fantastic! It has also been nice ... and helpful... to have someone to talk to almost everyday about this! I can't wait to see her 30 day results! 


And as always, if you would like more info on Isagenix, please let me know! I will help you sign up and start receiving product to help you feel your best! There are links provided within this blog... but if you want to sign up, let me help you! :) 

30 Days!

OK... here goes nothing!

So it has been 30 days since I've started this journey! The last couple of weeks have been frustrating... not going to lie! I did pretty well on my diet... may have cheated a few times here or there, but overall, no binge-ing or anything, so I call that successful.

I walked almost every night the last 2 weeks. I only took a night off when I was cleansing, and maybe another night or two when I was just not feeling it! I tried to jog a little here and there too...  I hate jogging... I jiggle too much :) .... and I hurt my knee! I self diagnosed it to the Medial Collateral Ligament... pretty sure I'm right... according to Dr. Google... don't really see anything else it could be.... and pretty sure I hurt it stepping off a curb the wrong way when I was walking one night. So I went and bought a pretty simple knee brace ... seems to be helping... that and some Ibuprofen and ice. 

So the frustrating part of the last 12 days is, I was not seeing any changes on the scale. I wanted to throw it at the wall at one point! I'm not exaggerating when I say I probably stepped on that damn scale like 20 times a day... so after I weighed myself this morning for my 30th day, I put the scale away. If I don't see it... I won't weigh myself, right? Well I did NOT get it back out all day... but every time I walked into the bathroom, my first thought was, "I should get on the scale." I realize this is an unhealthy obsession...I am not just a number. So away it is, and I am going to try my very hardest to not get it out until next week! I think once a week is good enough! I'll let you know how I do!

OK.. so to the results!

In 30 days, I lost 13.5 pounds and 19 inches! 

I'll spare you each measurement... but my biggest accomplishments in inches was my bust -2 inches, my rib cage -3 inches, my waist -2 inches and each thigh -2 inches.  If you really want to know, I will share all of them with you! 

When I look at it overall... I am proud of myself... When I compare week to week, this last weigh in was very frustrating to me! On day 8, I had lost 6.2 pounds 11 inches. On day 8, I had lost an additional 5.2 pounds and another 6.5 inches...  so... on day 30, I only lost an additional 2.2 pounds and 1.3 inches. I was hoping for the same results from day 8 and 18... 

Oh Well...  Life moves on and now I know I need to work harder and maybe make a few adjustments! I also need to allow myself to be proud of 13.5 pounds and 19 inches gone! Really frustrates me that I look at all the measurements and don't get excited! I mean... that's almost 1/2 a pound a day! 

I'm sure tomorrow I will wake up and say... you're crazy Jenn... you did great! :) A loss is a loss and I should be grateful for that! :) 

As for my mental well being? I'm feeling pretty good. I keep saying I don't have all that energy everyone else on Isagenix is talking about... what the heck???  But then I look at the laundry I just did, the kitchen I just cleaned, just the mundane house chores that I've slacked on lately... and I've been doing a good job lately! I'm actually getting off my lazy butt and getting stuff done! I must say... I have a wonderful husband that doesn't even complain... When I got pregnant with my last kid, Tyler about a year and 9 months ago, I was so sick and didn't do anything... like ANYTHING...  he would come home after a long day and cook dinner and start cleaning up. And then after Tyler was born... (he will be 1 in 2 weeks! crazy), I was stuck in a funk. Didn't want to do anything... like EVER. Well I can still say I don't WANT to do these mundane house chores... but I'm doing them, and that's a step in the right direction! So, if you're reading this hunny... Thank you for being there for me. I really appreciate it from the bottom of my heart. You have been good to me.

But I am feeling good... still have my days, but overall... doing good! :)  

So... before and after pictures???? I contemplated even posting these... because after looking at them, I'm failing to really see a difference? Even thinking the side view looks worse in the 30 day picture than the day 1 picture...  maybe I was sucking it in more on my day 1 picture than I realized?!? lol! .... O well, the numbers don't lie.... 

Maybe I should have made it more authentic before and after pictures by wearing makeup in  the after... and making the before black and white..... but this isn't my after... this is my working on it phase... when I hit those 100 pounds, bet your ass I'll be all done up and looking hot!

Well folks.. that's my 30 days... I guess I'll take it! I will try to update like once a week or so, maybe more, maybe less. we shall see!

And as always, if you would like more info on Isagenix, please let me know! I will help you sign up and start receiving product to help you feel your best! There are links provided within this blog... but if you want to sign up, let me help you! :)